One night I had some friends over at my house. We were having a great time. My teenager came home, said hi to everyone and I thought nothing of it.
A day later one of my friends called and said she had to tell me something.
She sounded hesitant but said she had prayed about it and knew she had to tell me. I reassured her and told her to tell me. If she was inspired to tell me something, I wanted to hear it!
She explained she had an impression that my son was on drugs that night. She had experience with this herself, via family members. So she knew the signs.
I told her Thank you!!!
Then talked to my husband, prayed and pondered.
I bought some drug tests off of Amazon, just in case I wanted to go that route.
Drugs or Jet Lag?
That night we sat down with our son and asked about drug use. He reassured us that he hadn’t used any. He said, “I will pee in a cup right now if you want.” How I wished Amazon Prime was a 4 hour service instead of 48 hours. (this was back in 2014, today I probably could have gotten it in 4 hours!)
We said maybe we would do something like that in the future. But right now we just wanted to talk.
We had a great discussion, about drugs, friends, communication, etc. In the end we realized that his behavior was probably related to having come home from Australia the day before my friend saw him and having jet lag.
8 year old offers to be test subject
2 days later the Amazon package arrived. I had ordered a set of 5 drug tests and frankly, even though I believed my son, I wanted to try out one of these tests. Bryson, my then 8-year-old volunteered to pee in the cup.
But I wanted the 16- year-olds pee. So I requested it from him, though I was a little nervous about it. Would he be mad? Would he really test clean?
Ahhhhgggg!!!! Talk about stressful.
He didn’t seem to mind being a test subject. He tested clean. I noticed he was pretty darn dehydrated and promptly gave him a lot to drink.
I said, “Now you know I have them and I will use them. Maybe it is good ammunition if someone offers you drugs.”
“Sorry, my mom randomly drug tests me, I can’t join in.”
He did tell his youth leader that we had drug tested him. The leader replied. “Your mom must really love you.” I thought that was a pretty good response on the fly. Or maybe he has lots of kids telling him that?
Was he Offended?
When I told my friends they were very concern I had offended my son by doing that. I was curious, so we I asked him. He assured me he hadn’t been offended.
I figure I would rather offend my child than not know he was doing drugs. But it was nice to know it hadn’t hurt our relationship in any way.
I WANT to Know!
I am SO glad my friend told me what she noticed. It ended up not being what she thought, but imagine if it was. I WANT TO KNOW if my kid is getting into trouble. Please tell me if you see any of my kids doing something wrong or dangerous. Or even if you suspect it. I won’t be the person who says, “Not MY kid.” Because while I think my boys are pretty amazing, I don’t know what they are doing every second of the day. They are human and make mistakes. I would rather be informed and then had a good conversation with my child and figure out what is going on. And hey, I might get to try out another drug test I have hidden in my house.
Fun Family Activity?
Let’s all take drug tests tonight??
I am partially kidding.
But what if for a Family Activity you show the 5 tests your ordered from Amazon (for only $25) and say, “These are in the house and I may randomly drug test anyone at any given point.”
Then talk about it.
- How does that make them feel?
- Do they think that is a good idea?
- Would it help them avoid drugs or push them towards them?
Man what a conversation starter!